Compelled by Love

I've got nothing on my mind or heart at the moment, so let's just see where this goes as I give an update of what's going on with me.

The internship is still going full steam. It seems like it really always is -- the question is whether I'm on board. There are weeks where I feel ready to leave to Africa and conquer the world for the Kingdom in a moment, and then weeks where I find myself dealing with paltry issues of life entirely absorbed in a natural mindset. I've begun to look for evidence of my spiritual progress not so exclusively in ministry numbers or how I feel this week but how much am I really being changed into Christ's image by yielding to the holy spirit and how much are my people being changed. This must sound cliche but you must understand what I mean. It's no grandiose revelation that fruit -- not loudmouthed speech or an exclusive avenue of spirituality someone has carnally spent themselves on to look good -- but fruit is the standard of measurement of a person's level of conformity to Christ.

See, what I seek is to be changed to change. To be wrecked to wreck. To so assault whatever in me is not like Christ so that I can legitimately gain the authority and power to wreak havoc on the work of the devil. As Paul said, "I beat my body into submission." Masochistic? No, but things worked out such that we have a body fit for destruction. If only we could see that suffering its loss -- not physically through death but by yielding (a most uncomfortable venture) to the holy ghost -- we are made like Him.

I hope what I am saying makes sense. This is one of the most impacting revelations I have gained since being here. It's the concept of humbling oneself to be lifted up supernaturally. This is the practical application of "I must decrease, that He may increase." If we really want God to "take it all", as so many of our songs and prayers cry, then why do we shy away from the smallest leading of the holy spirit? Why don't we lay hands on that person in the wheelchair at the mall? Why don't we confess our foolish words to the person we've been talking badly about? Why do we shy away from being the one whose gas money is spent?

I was talking with my good friend about this. If I have a totally new nature that is like Christ, and yet it is evident that I often live in such a way or do something that is inconsistent with the Spirit of Christ, then what is up? My friend was like, "yeah I'm saved, and I'm not looking at porn or lusting after everything in pants, but why do I still from time to time get those thoughts? If these desires have been crucified, then how can they still exist?"

I believe it is because we have settled for a level of holiness that allows us to look good in comparison to one another without that ever-present holy discontentment for greater conformity to His image. There's no discontentment because we're content. The question we ask here is, "I'm all for being like Christ, but why do we really need that discontentment if we're already for sure saved?" This really is a paramount question, the answer to which distinguishes mere followers from disciples.

This desire for more is not to the end of simply being more spiritual but rather it is to the end of the salvation of the world. It comes from recognizing God's vision for the world -- His purpose in creating everything -- and from there realizing one's place in His vision and from there stopping at nothing to please Him by moving forward in faith meanwhile having the fleshly nature being lost in the translation.

We've got to get our eyes off of the fact that we're going to heaven and onto the realities of the Kingdom of Heaven. This thing is bigger than your eternal destination, and I am sorry if someone's preaching gave you a different idea.

Imagine a church full of warriors -- people who have realized these things and march to the heartbeat of the father, who must become like Him to carry His power to conquer the darkness in the world so that God might get what He wants. That's all there is to this thing -- that the Lamb that was slain might gain the reward of His suffering, that the Father who gave infinitely might enjoy mankind eternally, as was His purpose in the beginning. These people are not concerned with how early the service starts, or whether the air conditioning works. Their eyes are on the King, and their love for God that was birthed in them when His display of love (the gospel) gripped them, such that no reward - even of salvation and all the blessings of heaven -- could ever satisfy, save the reward of pleasing Him. These people would give whatever it takes to see Him pleased. They would become so desperate to please Him that they be driven to confront every remnant of carnality that remains in them so they can live in the caliber of Christ likeness required to see this thing done.

Oh, pierce our hearts!